The XBox 180

Wow, I really fucked up...
Wow, I really fucked up…

If you haven’t heard, Microsoft is reversing its policies on the 24 hour check in necessary for the XBox One.  In the statement, they say that they will, of course, also have to scrap the great things they had plan that needed that connection, including the family plan that would let you share games between 10 family members.  Oh no!  A great thing is being taken away by nasty, angry internet posters!!!

Ok folks, let’s clear away some bullshit here.  Microsoft was NEVER going to allow you to share one game among ten people.  Never, ever.  Do you really think their developers and publishers were going to be ok with the system potentially cutting their revenue by up to 90%?  Hell no.  They want all ten people to buy the game. They honestly can’t afford for you to share games!  That’s why they hate the used game market in the first place!  So sorry, Microsoft, you made a bullshit promise with that family plan and thought people would buy into it as the benefit for what was really just shitty DRM.

But wasn’t the push to digital sales going to drop the price of games like it does with Steam?  Fuck no it wasn’t.  They were still going to sell you the same game you could buy at the Gamestop down the street for the same goddamned price – $59.99, digital or disc.  They’re “great sales” would have amounted to no better than buying a used game.  They were not going to start dropping game prices to $5 or $10, or drop new game prices for digital by $10-$20.  Why?  Because again, the publishers would literally leave.  They are already finding it hard to recoup the huge development and marketing budgets for their games – do you really think they want to sell them for less than they do now?  Again, digital and “cloud based games” was all about DRM and doing shitty things like pushing stealth advertising into your games.

But, but, the cloud!  The future is digital!  Yeah, maybe in twenty years when the cable companies get off they fucking asses and replace the shitty networks we have today.  I have Time Warner second tier high speed internet…I am lucky to get 15 Mbs.  Downloading a game on my 360?  They average 6.5 gigs, which should only take about 20 minutes to download, but have never taken less than two hours.  Why?  Because my download speed isn’t the problem – Microsoft’s shitty servers can’t handle the traffic, never could, and I have zero reason to believe they will in the future.  I’m sure the assholes sitting in Redmond beta testing right off the goddamned server get great throughput.  Have them come to my house, which is in the middle of a typical US city, and see how fucking long a game takes to load.  Which was another giant coffin nail in that pie-in-the-sky family plan, by the way.  Digital is simply NOT BETTER when it comes to transferring large amounts of data to a hard drive.

Ok, but wait, what about not having to disc swap?  Yeah, there’s ZERO reason they couldn’t keep that feature.  Download your game to the XBox One and you agree to lose the right to sell the disc, and there you go, no disc swapping.  Or base the DRM on having the main game disc in and allow the extra to be loaded separately.  Or if the fucking cloud is so fucking glorious, why would any game NEED a second disc?

Anyway, as you can probably tell, I’m still a titch pissed at Microsoft.  To be honest, they have fucked up so hard lately with Windows 8 and now this that I don’t know if they’re trying to ruin their company.  They need to fire Don Mattrick from XBox posthaste, and never let him near a microphone again.  He single handedly dropped Microsoft share prices by at least a few percent last week.  You know, I love my PS1 and my PS2.  I was lured to the 360 by things like Mass Effect (which went into fail mode with the ending to 3) and the prohibitive cost of the PS3, but now…man, Microsoft, you’ve stopped pissing on my head and telling me it’s raining, but you still haven’t given me a reason to buy your box, which is less powerful than the PS4 and costs $100 more with a creepy always on camera.  Seriously, no one fucking cares about the Kinect, assholes.

No one.

NO. ONE.

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