Oh Agents of SHIELD, how you disappoint me

Last night’s season finale of Agents of SHIELD really encapsulates everything that was wrong with this season.


Let me start off by saying I actually LIKED the finale for the most part.  There was closure on the Hydra storyline, Ward got his from May, Garrett got a Whendonesque ending, Fitz admitted how much he loves Simmons, and SHIELD is on its way back thanks to a wonderful, absolutely wonderful, cameo by Sam Jackson.

But…the mystery of Coulson’s resurrection is still hanging over our heads. I get we know how (alien juice) and why (because Coulson WAS a fallen Avenger…which brought a tear to my eye).  But the repercussions haven’t been dealt with.  We got the final scene with Coulson scratching Kree language all over a wall (how many media outlets are going to miss that it’s Kree writing?  Seriously, we ALL KNOW what it is).  What we didn’t get was finding out Coulson has the personality of Captain Marvel in him, or that he has special powers because of it.

But…we got ZERO closure on Skye.  We still don’t know what she is, and if that really was her father, it didn’t look like a Kree.  Is she an Inhuman?  What the fuck, Agents of SHIELD…this was your CENTRAL MYSTERY and you failed to resolve it. Ok, fine, you have a second season, but couldn’t we have maybe had a hint?  Skye glowing, or flying, or something?  You dropped the ball on this…again.

And that’s really the point.  All season long the show dropped the ball. All we needed was just something, a crumb that the Skye story is worth waiting until Season Two.  We got nothing.

Oh well.  It looks like Agent Triplett is here to stay, hooray.  Trip is the fucking MAN.  Way better than Ward.  I would not mind him hooking up with Skye, Simmons, and May…at the same time!  And we get Patton Oswalt back.  And the Avengers gun returns, though clearly the Hydra blaster is better.  Coulson should carry that bad boy around.  Sure, May should have kept the Berserker Staff, because she kicks much ass with it, but our heroes are in a good place at the end of the season.  Well, except Fitz, who may have brain damage.  Anyone expecting him being wheelchair bound next season?

Anyway, while it was a really good episode, I wish there was one more code episode to go, to really set up the next season.


One thought on “Oh Agents of SHIELD, how you disappoint me

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  1. “Well, except Fitz, who may have brain damage. Anyone expecting him being wheelchair bound next season?”

    I agreed with everything you said except I don’t expect Fitz to have any brain damage. He should make a complete recovery and I can’t understand why people think he’ll have brain injury based on what we’ve seen or on what Fury said. Fact one: Fitz is a mammal. Fact two: mammals have a primitive reflex called the mammalian diving reflex to protect them for at least one hour from drowning. Fact three: humans can trigger that reflex as happened to Fitz by going unconscious and being hit by cold rushing water to the face… especially the eyes– you can do the same consciously but for some reason it’s least effective the more you use higher centers of brain function unless you train for it like free diving or pearl diving or by “tadpoling”– it’s a swimming technique used by recruits for the US Navy SEALS (you’re in a pool, submerged, your legs anchored down with weights and you’re timed to see how long you can stay underwater without drowning– the reflex kicks in before that but those that tap out wash out unless they do better the next time). As the reflex happens, blood gets shunted between the heart and brain as oxygen is depleted so that almost all the circulation is between the brain and heart. The process results in 3 things: low heart rate (just like Fury described), limp arms and legs (like we saw), and a period of apparent loss of oxygen because the blood gets filtered by the lungs allowing only a liquid to fill the empty spaces in the lungs and thoracic cavity protecting the mammal making it seem as Fury said, “his brain was without oxygen for a long time”. It’s a temporary thing and if SHIELD’s medtechs know what to do and they will, Fitz should like all near-drowning survivors do, make a complete recovery with minimal if any memory loss though that’s permanent and due mostly to psychologic reasons rather than physiologic ones. And, the writers should portray him as such if they want to keep it real and if he isn’t like that then I know he’s faking it.

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